Cookie Dough Truffles

You all know my addiction to truffles is a serious thing, and I try not to limit myself to what kinds of chocolate goodies I bake, so I figured...it's been a while since I've given you all something to go crazy over in the kitchen. Last time, I shared the Chocolate Oreo Truffle recipe with you guys, so this one should be just as mouth watering, if not better. 

As a kid, and even now, if I'm baking cookies, I'm the person whose picking the cookie dough off the beaters from the hand mixer, regardless of the raw egg. When a friend of mine made these for a party, I went absolutely bananas and needed the recipe ASAP. They're so good, I promise you're going to love them! 

Cookie Dough Truffles

Ingredients:

• 1/2 cup butter, softened
• 3/4 cup firmly packed brown sugar
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
• 2 cups all-purpose flour
• 1 (14-ounce) can sweetened condensed milk
• 1/2 cup semisweet mini chocolate morsels
• 1 cup finely chopped pecans
• 1 1/2 pounds chocolate bark candy coating, melted

Directions:

In a large bowl cream butter and brown sugar with an electric mixer at medium speed until creamy. Add vanilla. Gradually beat in flour and add milk. Add chocolate morsels and pecans, mixing well. Shape into 1-inch balls. Place on waxed paper; chill 2 hours.

*Note: Since the dough is sticky, roll your fingers into flour. This will make it easier to roll.

Melt chocolate bark candy coating in a double boiler. Using 2 forks, dip cookie balls into candy coating to cover. Place on waxed paper and chill to set. Store in the refrigerator for at least 1 hour. 

The LIttlest Things...

I want to share this with all of you, because a friend of mine was kind enough to share it with me. I did not write this, but my friend did; I just felt that it needed to be shared with girls everywhere. So here it is...the littlest things. 


FOR THE HAPPINESS OF ALL WOMEN.
Just read this!

You study/read boring stuff, so surely you can read about something that is of intrest to you!
And I wrote this, so you're not just reading some hokem article about love in some chain letter.
This is a heartfelt article about..... matters of the heart!

***First and foremost, this is merely an experiment based on my own curiosity by observation of the responses, so DO respond! Let your opinion be heard, even if it contradicts mine.

What is it that women really want?
Why are women "so hard to understand?"
Is it really the "I'm fine" assurance or the "Does this outfit make me look fat?" loaded question that frightens your boyfriends? Or is a lack of self-esteem the core reason for our troubles?

Chic flick after chic flick, we sit and ponder what are these people doing and how do they find happy endings?!

In The Ugly Truth, an OCD woman with no clue how to secure a relationship somehow manages to win the heart of the very man that does a tv segment on how to fall in lust, not love. In He's Just Not That Into You, Gigi was throwing herself at Alex but when he tells her he's not that into her, all she has to do is get into some heated argument with him about how she's a lot closer to finding love because she takes risks and he miraculously then falls for her?? WTF. No! This isn't real life!

When you watch a movie like this, girls will start to observe... "What did this woman do to be desired by said lead male character?" And chances are, she's no prettier or more interesting and charismatic than you. Still, we think to ourselves, "What if I just lost like 10 pounds... or.. dyed my hair a different color.. Maybe he only likes girls with really dark hair? Or girls that can kick ass! Yea! Like in Resident Evil!"

Screw these movies! A wise person once told me, "500 Days of Summer is a better movie than He's Just Not That Into You because it doesn't ruin itself with a Hollywood ending." He doesn't get the girl. Not THAT girl. He learns to let go when he realizes she meant a lot more to him than he did to her. She was his world, and he was her 'this'll work for now' guy. Is YOUR relationship an equal give and take? Or do you have to get over Summer and find your Autumn?

You have to stick to your guns and go about with life. If you haven't had your happy ending yet, maybe it's because you're 19. Or 26. Or 33. Whatever! You HAVEN'T found your missing puzzle piece yet. Stop stressing. Maybe the long-term relationship you've got going is the WRONG one, but you're too afraid to leave it because you've gotten comfortable, and you think no one will ever be able to fill that void.

Ask yourself this... Are you happy? No. Are you REALLY happy? Is this ALL you ever wanted and more? If you answered YES, then congratulations, madam. You are one lucky duck! But if you hesitated, even a little, maybe this is something you should think about. If you can't find someone right now, chill out! Do you have other priorities right now such as securing a good-paying job or graduating? Find a self-fullfilling distraction, because those are the things you are SUPPOSED to be doing right now. Whether or not you're a firm believer in "things happen for a reason," going by that gives you a reason to, well, keep going. If you don't think you're pretty or on the road to success, isn't it obscolete what a possible relationship partner thinks? Be proud of yourself first, because no one else should fill those needs for you... He/she should complement those aspects, but not fill them.

On the flipside, are you already with someone... but it's not turning out like everything you'd hoped for? If not, then spit out the candy now because it's not going to taste better the longer you keep sucking on it. It doesn't matter how big or small your issue is... if you're not totally happy, then it's not right. Whether you've been with someone for 3 months or 5 years, is it worth being with the wrong person for the next 30 because you're too afraid to bow out? If you tell jokes and you feel like he/she just doesn't get your sense of humor, that's troubling. If your partner acts like a totally different person with you than he/she does around other people, that's a problem. If you have a lot in common but you wish he was a gentleman and he isn't, why are you settling?

Everyone is different. I'm not in any way saying that if two people have differences of opinions or a problem, they can't work things out... You have to find a balance. Weigh the things that are important to you. If you're really hitting it off, but he/she doesn't like the same sports teams or movies you watch or political party, it's not necessarily a deal breaker.... or is it? That's really up to you! If it really bothers you, that's your choice. What might bother some is really not a big deal to you. For example, I don't care if a guy is not that into Spongebob or doesn't like putting mayo on a sandwich, but I won't date a smoker or a guy who's cocky and isn't a gentleman. You have the power to choose how you want to be treated.

Sometimes, it really is the littlest things that make you happy. What means something to you?
Being told you're beautiful even when you're not feeling/looking your best?
Knowing your boyfriend/girlfriend isn't ashamed to say he/she is with you?
If their Facebook default picture is a picture of both of you? Or the fact that Facebook says you're in a relationship, even if "it's just facebook and he/she doesn't care?" If it makes you happy, then your partner wouldn't be so opposed to doing it. It's not silly! Maybe you SAY you don't care because you've given up hope he would make it "facebook official" but it means something to you. So don't overlook it!
How about just GETTING you? How you talk, your jokes, your quirks, your music, your habits, etc. Does he/she match up to the closeness of your CLOSEST friends?????
If not, they should!!!!!****

HERE'S A BIG ONE: Ask yourself this: Does he/she have your back in the way that you have his/hers?
If not, RUN! Run far, run fast! If that person needed you at the drop of a hat right now, would you have their back? Hopefully that answer is yes. If not, then maybe you're misleading the person you're with, and you're going to break their heart eventually. But if you do, ask yourself, do they? Again, if you even have to hesitate, then run. Maybe you or your partner has growing up to do. Maybe they'll never change to suit you. Either way, if they're not good for NOW, then be alone NOW.

What's sad is that the best, most sound advice on relationships is rendered pointless if you YOURSELF don't believe it and follow it. Know when to let go, or if you can't find anyone, learn to DO YOU. If you rule out anything in yourself you want to work on to be the best YOU you can be, then you'll always know that it's THEM and not YOU that is missing out. That's why you've got to be a strong individual on your own before you can lean on anyone else. It's okay to give love a chance. Fall in love. You will probably get hurt again. But each time you fall, you get that much closer to finding what you're supposed to have. You learn what you don't want, and what you do want. Strive for your own happy ending. Everyone deserves to be happy... even if it comes from the littlest things.

What NOT to get your girlfriend for Valentine's Day!

Boys, this one's for you, so listen up! With Valentine's Day right around the corner, we know you're all flipping trying to figure out what to get your girlfriend's, or the girl you're "together but not dating" with. We know it's hard, so I did some browsing around and found a list on gyeah.com of what NOT to buy your girlfriend. Granted I'm sure there are plenty more bad idea gifts than what's on this list, but let's try and steer clear of anything that you need to think twice about. Trust me. 

Alright fella's, that time has come around again where you have to shell out some cash for that special one you love. Some people are more monetarily equipped for this season than others, but if you have a real woman by your side;then what you buy isn't as important as to the thought that comes behind it. And that's what this article's about. This letter goes out to all those dumb ass guys who fail to put thought in their gifts. This, my dear readers, is to allow you to still have a girlfriend by the time Sweetie's Day rolls around. This is a list of what NOT to get your girlfriend for Valentine's Day. So boys strap in, and let's get this lesson underway.

10. PLASTIC FLOWERS

The easiest gift to get, yet you have to be so f'n cheap about it that you buy her plastic flowers? My God man, if times are that hard just go out in your best friends front yard and pull out some flowers. It will be better than going to your girls door with some flowers that look like they've been based in a ton of lotion. The same lotion that you'll be using if you dare go to your girl's house with plastic flowers.

9. BAR OF SOAP

Women like to smell good, yes. So buy them some Victoria Secret Lotion or some perfume. But coming to the house with a bar or soap says  nothing to your girl but, "Damn, you need to wash yo ass!!!"

8. HALF EATEN BOX OF CHOCOLATES

Ok folks, lets not take a book out of Shook's home manual. You do not eat the candy you got your girl...that=BIG NO NO. She'll think that either 1.) You think she's fat, and she doesn't need to eat any candy that you already haven't gotten ridden of OR 2.) You put about as much thought into this gift as you did deciding rather or not you need to put on a new pair of underwear today. Either way=No Funtime for the boyfriend.

7. FREE MEMBERSHIP FOR A FITNESS CLUB

MAYDAY!!! MAYDAY!! You're calling your girl a fat ass, and you should run towards the nearest exit immediately.

6. SEX TIPS FOR GIRLS BOOK

The last thing you want to give you girl is a gift that says, "You know, when I moan...I'm faking it. Here's something to make that moan real."

5. BUST ENHANCER CUPS

Expect some serious  crying to come behind this one guys, girls are sensitive about their bodies. And you saying how beautiful she is, then popping up with a gift that says.."Hey babe, you'd be perfect if you made your breast look larger,"...is not a good way to keep the romance going on Valentine's Day.

4. LET'S JUST BE FRIENDS CARD

Girls are usually the assholes in this department, but boys can be just as cruel. You DO NOT say "Let's Just Be Friends"  under any circumstances, ESPECIALLY ON VALENTINE'S DAY. You might as well just take out your girls heart, and urinate on it with burning piss.

3. I.O.U LETTER

What the f***?!?! Were you born stupid, or was that an aquired trait? If you forgot Valentine's day, or you failed to buy her anything..DON'T GIVE HER AN I.O.U letter. Just spend time with her!! Valentine's day is on one day, saying you're going to give her something on another day completely defeats the purpose of V-a-l-e-n-t-i-n-e-'s day. Dumb ass!!

2. NOTHING AT ALL

Boy, if you want to look like a complete and total jackass...this is the way to go. Let your girl come to you with her gift all  nicely wrapped, grinning from ear to ear, and eagerly awaiting you to open her gift. You open it, and its a very expensive watch. She then gives you that puppy dog look, and sticks out her hand..and what do you have her. NOT A GOD DAMN THING!!! Do you realize that you are now THE worst species on the planet? You might as well become an assasin, cause you just stopped this girl's life with no remorse whatsoever.

1.    Last but not least …The Gift You Gave Your Ex That She Gave Back To You

A Girl's Best Friends: Her Girls and Her Shoes

"It's difficult to walk in a single woman's shoes. That's why every once in a while we need a really good pair to make the walk more fun!" - Sex and the City

As I get older I find that I value things differently than I did when I was younger. When you're a kid every person you met could had the potential to be your best friend; you bonded of a 96 count box of Crayola crayons on your first day of school and the rest was history. In high school, you bond over the stereotypical teenage things; clothes, shoes, music, boys. There's always the cliques; the jocks, the popular kids, the metal heads/punk/emo kids, the nerds, and the geeks. Everyone is separated by what you think you are and who you think they are. You never really get to know anyone the way you should. I found that all of that changed when I got to college. I was able to make a fresh start for myself, be whoever I wanted to be, yet be the person I knew deep down that I was all along. 


College was where I met my best friends (and reconnected with an old friend). My best friend Jenna and I met in our senior year of high school working at a craft store. We didn't go to the same high school, but met on Halloween 2006...she was dressed like a dalmatian and I was wearing a princess crown...my first day of work and we bonded instantly. To this day we say that Halloween is our anniversary. I met Melissa our sophomore year of college at the first day of dance practice. Our captains had this idea that we'd all get to be great friends if we did these community questionnaires before each practice so we could get to know each other. I remember that the question was "what's your favorite movie" and I wrote down Harry Potter. Not five minutes later did I hear this high pitched little voice scream "who wrote Harry Potter?!" and that was that. Best friends.

 In light of my friends and I, I like to think we're much like the girls from Sex and the City...even if there are only three of us. We're inseparable, each with our own personalities and ways of doing things, yet at the end of the day if we called each other and said "I need you" we'd be in the car making the trip to be with the other. That's just the way it works with us. I find that my best friends are, in a sense, like the shoes in my closet; bear with me on this one, I promise it will make sense. 


Each shoe serves a purpose, each one looks different, fits different; a different color, shape, heel, you name it and the variety of shoes in my closet is incredible. I find that the diversity of my shoes reminds me so much of the diversity of my friends. Each one of us serves a different purpose and has a different way of viewing things. My friend's are like my shoes; I can't leave the house without the right pair of shoes or I feel completely off balance. It's the same perspective with the girls, I feel off balance if I don't talk to them for a few days, if we don't see each other because of work or school; it just doesn't feel right. 


The same way a girl needs the right shoes is the same way that a girl doesn't feel complete if she doesn't have good friends to walk through life with. Right shoes can make all the difference, and I know that by having the right friends in my life, it's made all the difference. My girls are like my sisters, and the next closest thing would be for the three of us to truly be blood related. 


I'm dedicating this post to my best friends, Jenna and Melissa; and to all the girls who have the right pairs of shoes in their life. <3

Happy Holidays?

I'm starting to think that retail therapy in any way is a thing of the past when the holidays are upon us. I can't say I've gotten much shopping done; okay I lied, I haven't gotten any of my shopping done, but I'm really dreading the whole day at the mall thing. I already spend all of my time there as it is, work has officially swallowed me whole. Aside from that, people are down right rude during the holidays! I'm not saying that we've all got to be bubbly and cheery and singing jingle bells as we walk around the mall, but I can't stomach the attitude of some of these people. It is the holidays after all, and I can't help but wonder if these people realize that. 

It's the Christmas season, and in my eyes that's a time for giving, and as a person who works in retail I've pretty much given not just my life to help people search out and purchase the perfect timeless gift, but I've also given my time, opinion and honesty. Now, for a large handful of the people I do help, they appreciate it. I like the nice people; but get nasty with me while I'm helping you and I'm just going to smother on the kindness. Kill em with kindness is what I always say. 


I get it, you know what a stylus is, sue me for trying to help you out with your gift purchase. Yea, you were looking at technology accessories; I made a suggestion, that's my job. People get rude when they hear a price they don't like, when they need to buy something expensive, or when it's not 100% what they thought they would find. "You mean you don't have it here? I have to go somewhere else?" Yes, you need to walk somewhere else in the mall. IN THE MALL. It's not a foreign country, I'm not telling you that you need to swim vast oceans to find your product, I'm telling you that just maybe, you need to hop on the escalator and walk 20 or 30 feet to another store. 

I thoroughly am fed up and disappointed with the level of rudeness that some of these people exhibit. It's Christmas, celebrate it with joy, and try and be happy. Don't look at it as "ugh I need to buy for HIM" think of it as being lucky that you have that person in your life and you can get them a gift. There's a lot of people who don't have that special someone in their life anymore, or whose spouse, brother, sister, regardless, isn't with them this holiday or can't be with them. It shouldn't make you aggravated to shop for people,  you still have them. Think of the people who don't. This is the second year I can't buy my G-ma a Christmas gift, and the fifth Christmas my mom is spending without her sister. 

I hope that everyone looks at what they do have this Christmas, and not what you don't have. Think of all that you have and thank whoever it is that you believe in for that person, or that special something in your life. I know I'll be doing it on Christmas morning, and while I'm with my family. 


Happy shopping, baking & decorating!

7 Layer Cookies

Being an Italian at Christmas time means that the incredible amount of baking that happens in my house is through the roof; I'm talking insanity. We do everything from sugar cookies, to chocolate chips, and everything you can imagine. 
One of my all time favorite cookies in the whole world are 7 Layer Cookies. I've had many a dispute with friends over the name of these, but growing up in Brooklyn has solidified the name of "7 layers" in my book. A lot of Italian's call them "tri colore" cookies and if you're not Italian then I know you're one of those people who call them rainbow cookies. Let's try and put a stop to that; PLEASE!
One of the best parts about these cookies is that it's a soft almond flavored cookie, there's almond jelly in there, and they're covered in chocolate. Stop me if there's anything delicious that I seem to be missing- and if you don't find these cookies appealing in any way shape or form I truly feel sorry for you, you're missing out. 
I love that my mom makes these from scratch each year, and Christmas is the only time she does bake them; any other time we want them we have to get my dad to stop at the bakery back home in Brooklyn on his way home from work. 
So, with that being said, I hope you guys try them. They're a bit of a task and really need attention and time, not something you can whip up and throw in the oven. So, if you're up to the challenge, give them a try. I promise you won't be disappointed! 

7 Layer Cookies

Ingredients:

• 4 large eggs, separated
• 1 cup sugar
• 1 (8-oz) can almond paste
• 2 1/2 sticks (1 1/4 cups) unsalted butter, softened
• 1 teaspoon almond extract
• 2 cups all-purpose flour
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 25 drops red food coloring
• 25 drops green food coloring
• 1 (12-oz) jar apricot preserves, heated and strained
• 7 oz fine-quality bittersweet chocolate (not unsweetened), chopped

Directions:

Put oven rack in middle position and preheat oven to 350°F. Butter a 13- by 9-inch baking pan and line bottom with wax paper, leaving a 2-inch overhang on 2 ends, then butter paper.

Beat whites in mixer fitted with whisk attachment at medium-high speed until they just hold stiff peaks. Add 1/4 cup sugar a little at a time, beating at high speed until whites hold stiff, slightly glossy peaks. Transfer to another bowl.

Switch to paddle attachment, then beat together almond paste and remaining 3/4 cup sugar until well blended, about 3 minutes. Add butter and beat until pale and fluffy, about 3 minutes. Add yolks and almond extract and beat until combined well, about 2 minutes. Reduce speed to low, then add flour and salt and mix until just combined.

Fold half of egg white mixture into almond mixture to lighten, then fold in remaining whites gently but thoroughly.

Divide batter among 3 bowls. Stir red food coloring into one and green food coloring into another, leaving the third batch plain. Set white batter aside. Chill green batter, covered. Pour red batter into prepared pan and spread evenly with offset spatula (layer will be about 1/4 inch thick).

Bake red layer 8 to 10 minutes, until just set. (It is important to undercook.)

Using paper overhang, transfer layer to a rack to cool, about 15 minutes. Clean pan, then line with wax paper and butter paper in same manner as above. Bake white layer in prepared pan until just set. As white layer bakes, bring green batter to room temperature. Transfer white layer to a rack. Prepare pan as above, then bake green layer in same manner as before. Transfer to a rack to cool.

When all layers are cool, invert green onto a wax-paper-lined large baking sheet. Discard paper from layer and spread with half of preserves. Invert white on top of green layer, discarding paper. Spread with remaining preserves. Invert red layer on top of white layer and discard wax paper.

Cover with plastic wrap and weight with a large baking pan. Chill at least 8 hours.

Remove weight and plastic wrap. Bring layers to room temperature. Melt chocolate in a double boiler or a metal bowl set over a saucepan of barely simmering water, stirring until smooth. Remove from heat. Keep chocolate over water.

Trim edges of assembled layers with a long serrated knife. Quickly spread half of chocolate in a thin layer on top of cake. Chill, uncovered, until chocolate is firm, about 15 minutes. Cover with another sheet of wax paper and place another baking sheet on top, then invert cake onto sheet and remove paper. Quickly spread with remaining chocolate. Chill until firm, about 30 minutes.

Cut lengthwise into 4 strips. Cut strips crosswise into 3/4-inch-wide cookies. Makes about 5 dozen cookies.

 

10 Things 90s Kids Will Have To Explain To Their Kids Someday...

I really couldn't resist making this my post for the week, because when I read it, I knew it was true in all aspects of it's title. Thoughtcatalog.com posted this list of 10 things that kids who grew up in the 90s are going to have to explain to their kids...it's completely accurate in every sense of it's essence. I want to make sure you all know, I didn't create this list, although I do have my own (maybe I'll post it one day), and all credit goes to Thought Catalog. They came up with it, I'm just helping to spread it's truth. 


If you were a child of the 90s like myself, leave a note in the comments section of this post, and let me know how you feel about it. Also, just so we're clear, in terms of item #7 on this list, I played for team BSB. I had a thing for Nick Carter and couldn't help it. 

While most things we experienced as tots in that headiest of eras seems pretty self-explanatory (plaid was everywhere, Leonardo DiCaprio was the molten ball of light around which the solar system turned, and there was no color too bright for your sweatpants) there are some things that will be a bit harder to explain. Here, a primer for when your future children want to know what the hell you were doing with your boxy, multicolored electronics.

Nov. 23, 2011

By Chelsea Fagan

1. Topanga was at some point in human history considered not only a legitimate first name for a human being, but the kind of name that would inspire in malleable teenage boys a life-long infatuation. Topanga, in our day, was leading lady name-material. Topanga (pronounced Tah-payne-ga, for those who will have only ever seen in it written down) is the name of the quintessential girl-next-door who will live, along with Feeney, in our hearts forever.

2. At some point, we carried around little plastic eggs with tiny screens on them — in these screens lived our hearts, our pets, our raison d’etre, our very own Tamagotchi. We loved them, we listened to their tiny electronic screams of malnourishment, and we occasionally forgot to pick up their poop for long enough that they died a tortured, poop-filled death. They were perhaps our first foray into the life-consuming world of electronics and self-absorption, later to be fully manifested by Facebook.

3. The black Power Ranger was black and the yellow Power Ranger was Asian because…we were so completely ahead of our time and beyond the capacity to even think in terms of something as inconsequential as race that… uh… I don’t know. Casting directors were racist in the nineties.

4. Long before he was spending his days foisting his mediocre children on us, Will Smith was actually the perfect human specimen. He also undoubtedly holds some world record for saving the world the most times while simultaneously delivering flawless catchphrases and giving cool guy nods to the camera. The Men In Black rap song, at the time, was created and received by the public without the slightest trace of irony. Really. He was that good.

5. In some inevitable shift of the time-space continuum in which James Cameron continues to rob humanity of all that is good and sacred in this world, Fern Gully will be known as that movie that ripped off Avatar. It will be up to us to crusade for what is right. It is up to us to explain that Fern Gully was not only a predecessor to Avatar, but far better, in that it contained both Tim Curry as a singing pile of molasses and Robin Williams rapping about animal testing in the pharmaceutical industry. (As a side note, if you have not recently listened to the full lyrics of the “Batty Rap,” I recommend you do, as they are horrifying.)

6. A neighborhood boy who completely disregards your family and puts a ladder directly under the teenage girl’s window to climb up at his discretion is not only acceptable, it’s charming. It’s the kind of stuff that would make said family take the ladder boy under their wing and into their heart. The nineties were a simpler time, one where we didn’t have to worry about things like breaking and entering. Clarissa today would have steel bars on the inside of her window and her father would continually remind her that the next-door boy with his ladder and his touchy hands have no place in his household.

7. Though on the surface, they are the exact same thing in every conceivable way, whether you liked The Backstreet Boys or N*SYNC said more about your character than all of the terrible macaroni art you could ever make for your child psychologist. Essentially, liking *NSYNC meant you liked Justin Timberlake, as he was clearly the Seabiscuit in that race from the get-go. You even liked him with his terrible, icy-blond mini-fro. Liking the Backstreet Boys gave you a bit more of a cultured palate, as there was no clear Diana in those Supremes. Nick was kind of the wholesome, if northern-Florida-redneck safe choice (save for his humiliating younger brother, Aaron). Brian was the shy, sensitive type. AJ was the hottt, dangerous meth addict. Kevin Richardson was mute with sexy, sculpted facial hair. No one liked Howie. Choosing between the two groups was like choosing between two beloved children, but once that line was crossed–there was no going back.

8. “I wanna really really really wanna zig a zig ahh,” has a meaning, and all true nineties kids know it, but we must never share it. Like the Illuminati, it must remain between us, the keyholders. With great power comes great responsibility.


9. Lisa Frank is not the name of a woman, it is the name of a movement, a culture, a way of living. It is a theory, a concept, a belief in something greater than yourself. It is the belief that all girls are entitled to dolphins covered with rainbows, jewel-encrusted frogs, and unicorns in acid-trip colors hugging each other. It is the ideology that no notebook is complete until it literally hurts your eyes to look at from so much color saturation. It is the hope that no school supply, no matter how insignificant, will be left un-bedazzled. It is the knowledge that your eraser cap, and that of your granddaughter’s, and her granddaughter’s after her, will not be some boring little nub–it will be a diamond covered with butterflies in a rainbow of colors. It is the dream of a better tomorrow.

10. Incredibly depressing women in Indiana covered in cats and glass figurines they buy at The Hallmark Store used to troll the web 1.0 to invest thousands of dollars in tiny stuffed animals filled with plastic beans. That happened. Beanie Babies were not just significant, they were the first example most of us had of envy, greed, and wrath. If someone messed up that little heart-shaped Ty tag, so help you God, that was the end of whatever contact you had with that monster of a human being. That tag-less Beanie Baby was now trash, and you had to deal with the consequence. It was at that moment, that de-valued Beanie Baby moment, that most of us accepted the truth… we’ll never have nice things.